Monday, August 14, 2006


The Twinigmatics are more recondite than usual of late, and no doubt enjoying a nice rest (or siesta for the Venezuelans) here on the one day of the last 32 in which the schedule gods have decreed baseball shomer shabbos. Despite some claims to the contrary, those of us at Tuesdays With Torii are NOT in fact, jumping ship or wagon. We feel entitled to our emotional outbursts of a roller coaster nature, yet still exist as fanatical day-traders in the market of hope run by Terry Ryan and Ron Gardenhire, which has been more bearish than bullish of late. For sale right now, hope futures with good long-term potential like LLE (Liriano Left Elbow), RLRFG (Radke Last Run For Glory), JWBJE (Johan Will Be Johan Eventually) and STELATS (Short Term Emotional Let-down After Tiger's Series). The prospectuses (prospectum? prospecti?) we read tell us not to worry -- the Sox and Sox have issues too. We don't make snap decisions. We don't jerk knees. We keep the faith and rely on long-term returns. Put me down for 10,000 and I'll call you next week to put some more Garza's away for my first-born's college education.


Jess said...

Isn't being a fan all about the crazy, dizzying highs and the dark, despairing lows? The smooth, creamy middles? As long as you're keeping the faith, I think you're entitled to freak out in either direction.

Now, I have to go light a candle for The Cisco Kid and say my prayers to the Baseball Gods.

Kaiser said...

Yes, I support all forms of faith-based cheering. Those Baseball Gods are fickle, and teams in wild card races need every edge they can get.

My favorite part of fandom is definitely the creamy middles, although I do enjoy a good nougat from time to time, as well.