Friday, April 27, 2007

Part the Deux

You might have heard that the Sawx and Yanks are playing this weekend. Again. In NYC this time though. As much fun as last weekend was, I'm finding it hard to find my excitement this early in the season. It could be that there is still snow on the ground, ice in the water up here in Icebergia doesn't make me think "baseball". It could also be that after tonites Daisuke "Clay" Matsuzaka vs. Andy Petitte match-up, we get such excitement as "Tim Wakefield and Kei Igawa star in Gopherball Derby" and I probably get to see Aaron f****g Boone a few hundred more times (sorry guys, doesn't work anymore - your febrile taunts bore me) and Julian Tavarez losing his mind after serving up A-Job April Homer's numbers 22 through 37. And Chien-Ming Wang, you can never forget the Wang.

But also, baseball just seems so silly right now, and that's mostly down to the rather bizarre story involving our namesake. No matter what Bud Selig tells you, there are no Royals in the champaign room. Seriously, Sammy Sosa's fivehead is going for six, Gary Matthews Jr. runs free, and someone is probably about to sign Raffy Palmeiro to the MLB equivalent of a ten-day, but we should be worried that Hunter sent a case'o'Cris to the Royals for assisting in last year's AL Central crown? Please.

In Little League, didn't everyone get a trophy? For most of the players on the Royals, this is that participation award. Thanks for playing guys, enjoy your bubbly, and your sparkly new Gil Meche. As for Mr. Selig, might I suggest that he team up with Alberto Gonzalez and tackle the true scourge of our day: Internet Pr0n.

P.S., I see your Twins Clubhouse Banter and raise you the Golden State Warriors. Boomwhatitdo?

Monday, April 23, 2007


This season is going EXACTLY like we thought...

TWT knew the Twins would be in first place at this point in the season.

TWT knew that Ramon Ortiz would be one lousy loss to the Royals away from a perfect start.

TWT knew that the Twins would have depth trouble…we even predicted Rondell White would injure himself skipping. (to be fair…we predicted it would be during a jubilant reaction to Zach Johnson’s win at the Master’s)

TWT knew that Jason Bartlett would struggle, but that due to his proper use of “I GOT IT”, Ron Gardenhire would stick with him through tough times.

TWT knew that Sidney Ponson would be the Twins best pitcher…if “best” was measured in liquid ounces of sweat.

TWT knew that Justin Morneau was still Canadian, and therefore unable to do anything BUT hit the ball hard in every direction.

TWT knew that after a brief, slow start…The Jesus would not only start hitting for extra bases, but would drive in runs as well. (RBI total to date: 9)

TWT knew that Jason Kubel would be used only against RHP’s…during day games…when it might rain.

TWT knew that Lew Ford's new role as baserunning coach would REALLY pay off. Thanks Lew!

TWT knew that the worst pitcher in the bullpen would be…Joe Nathan? No shit? We knew that? Okay…whatever.

TWT…bringing you all the hindsight clairvoyance you can handle

My Downstairs Neighbors Think I'm Crazy

Because I was jumping up and down and screaming like an idiot.

Of course, were one to jump up and down and scream like an idiot this would be a pretty good reason:

That, or shooting a 59 at St. Andrews on Tiger-Tiger Woods Y'all, '07. As the official representative, I have to say that RSN is pretty chuffed at this point in the season. No one besides Papi is really hitting yet, Schilling is carrying a set of Dub-Deuces around his midsection still and Dice-K has been good-but-not-great. Yet we're in first place and just swept the MFY's, with Slappy making the final out twice. Of course, my mere posting of this will cause an immediate 10 of 12 losing binge. Good work Pooh.

Learn to love the payroll.


Friday, April 20, 2007

Is That Eddie Guardado's Music?

So THIS is what other teams feel like.

If these late inning adventures continue...Johan's going to lose it.

Johan.....Johan Santana

Pat.....Pat Neshek

Joe.....Joe Nathan

[ open on a group of pitchers sitting near the post-game buffet]

[ pitchers makes a lot of noise with their forks and knives as the eat in disturbing silence ]

Johan: [ breaking silence ] How was the game today, Pat?

Pat: Fine.

Joe: Did you pitch well or were there problems? Like, maybe with a late home run?

Pat: No, I pitched well.

[ they continue to eat in silence, banging their knives and forks together as they eat ]

Johan: [ craving attention ] I had a.. funny thing happen last week. When I left the stadium, I had trouble unlocking my car. Then I realized I had the wrong set of keys.

Joe: Did somebody take your keys?

Johan: [ annoyed ] Can I finish the story? [ pauses in stern silence ] It turns out that I had accidentally taken Boof’s keys, and.. he had taken mine. We.. really had a long laugh.

Joe: Mmm, I thought that's who took them...

Johan: Will you ever let me finish a damn story?!

Joe: I-I just assumed that Boof’s -

Johan: I would love to finish one damn story!

Pat: Your stories are lame, Johan!

Johan: [ angry ] You do not talk to me like that!

Joe: Do not raise your voice!

Pat: Shut up!!

Johan: You do not talk to me like that!

Pat: I cannot believe -

Johan: I am a Cy Young Award winner!! That is very important!! That is very important!! You don't talk to me like that!! People are scared of me!!

Pat: Why would anybody be scared of you! I hate you, you big fat turd!

[ stunned, they continue to eat in awkward silence ]

Joe: I spoke with Juan Rincon this afternoon.

Pat: So?

Joe: I guess Juan’s really excited about the Kansas City game tomorrow night.

Pat: Oh, shut up, you twitchy bastard!

[ they return to silence ]

Johan: Did you pick up my dry cleaning?

Joe: Hmm, it's not ready until Thursday.

Johan: I thought you said it'd be ready today?

Joe: No, it's going to be ready Thursday.

Johan: You know, I have a big game tomorrow.

Joe: Well, I'm sorry.

Johan: I wish you weren't a liar!

Joe: I didn't lie, Johan.

Johan: I wish you weren't a liar!

Joe: I wish you wouldn't call me a liar!

Johan: Don't raise your voice at me!

Joe: I am not raising my voice!

Johan: You do not talk to me like that!! I work too hard to deal with this stuff!! I work too hard!! I'm a Cy Young Award winner!! I drive a Dodge Stratus!!

[ their screaming comes to an end, as the agonizing silence returns ]

Joe: Pat, do you want me to help you with your slider this weekend?

Pat: I wish you were dead!

[ awkward silence, a struggle for a normal conversion ]

Johan: I'm gonna take the car into the shop tomorrow.

Pat: You mean your lame Dodge Stratus?
Johan: You don't talk about my car that way!!

Joe: Dear Lord..

Johan: I drive a Dodge Stratus!! You don't talk about my Dodge Stratus that way!!

Pat: Shut up!

Johan: You do not talk to me that way!! I am a Cy Young Award Winner!! I can do 100 push-ups in twenty minutes!!

Pat: I'm going to Glen’s house! I hate you - both!

[ Pat storms out of the house ]

[ Johan grabs Pat's plate, and separates the food between he and Joe ]

Johan: This chicken is delicious.

Joe: It's a recipe from Lipton Cup-a-Soup.

[ fade out ]

(Obviously borrowed from this)

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Red Sox Nation....with extra cheese

This is indescribable.
(via Deadspin)

Monday, April 16, 2007

Irony, Thy Name is Devil Ray

Well, my overwhelming impression of the Tampa Bay series was, in the immortal words of Homer Simpson...meh. No wait...strike that...snuh. Pick any psedo-sensical word you want, the fact is that it was a very blase series for the Twinks, and today's off day seems welcome, if not for the players then for the collective psyche of the fanbase. The series was so blase, in fact, that it caused us here at TWT to do a bit of an overhaul -- call it spring cleaning if you will -- nothing drastic. Any future aesthetic suggestions can be placed in our comment box, as usual (the one marked "Queer Eye for the Webmaster Guy".

The irony of the last four games was that the two losses came on the backs of arguably the two most stable guys on the team -- Santana and Nathan.

What does this say to us overly analytical types? Well, nothing really. Coincidence is the best answer in my guestimation. Those guys are going to have their radar screen blips, and they just happened to come against a blipping crappy-ass team like the D-Rays. At home. With them running the bases as if for the first time. It's tough to sort through what is "young" behavior and what is just good old fashioned inferior genetics when it comes to athletics, so I have a problem automatically drinking the media Kool-aid about the ups and downs of a baseball team undergoing a youth movement like the Rays. We hear all about them being "talented but young" early last week, but I'm not sure that's what we saw so much as a slight choke job by our squad. It might turn out that this group of young Rays is just bad. Nathan, frankly, got bailed out earlier by Crawford's unbelievable base-running gaff. In fact, it was so bad, I'm not sure gaff is a good enough description. It was a flat out flurge. I just made that word up. The fact is that even when you're not playing at peak form as a team, you gotta step up in close games and win them, no matter who you're playing.

Still, my optimism is not entirely crushed. It's going to take a whole lot more Mauer groundouts to second (teeing one up for Hops) and Punto hissy fits to do that. And I know Nathan and Santana are going to be fine. Ponson's control has me somewhat worried, but not as much as his decision in hair stylists. Ortiz just can't be this good the whole season, but if he's anywhere even close, I'll take it. Boof and Silva I don't have the energy to discuss. If there is a silver lining it's the fact that there are many division games still to come, and maybe we can get in some kind of groove by then.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

We Are What We Pretend To Be

I’m incapable of writing any worthy tribute to Kurt Vonnegut...that's for someone else.

I can only say that reading his books always make me feel like writing.


Does it feel nice this morning, Twins fans? Breathing again, I mean? I can only assume the first RBI of the year for favorite son Joe Mauer brought a collective exhale from Twindom last night. I know it did for me. As a matter of fact, after listening to The Jesus’ fateful at-bat, I was so confident of victory that I turned off The Talk Station and turned my full attention to the sneaky blonde bitch on Lost. (It’s about time she turns on us, we already know Jack has trouble picking the right ladies to fall for)

Sure, sure…I could dwell on the fact that our #3 hitting, defending batting champ, #1 draft choice, Juicy Nookie eating superstar BUNTED with a runner in scoring position earlier in the game…but I won’t. I don’t really care. My team won…the MFY’s lost. And the Little Latin Lover pitched his arse off.

The only lingering problem for me this morning…why the hell doesn’t The Fightin’ Canadian have a playoff beard? Some fan.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007


Things you, a Twins fan, are allowed to be frustrated about today:

Scoring 2 runs at home
Your batting champ having no R’sBI through six games
Jeff Cirillo going on the DL
The extreme lack of power from this line-up
Jason Kubel’s fielding
Ticket pricing for the Yankees' series
Michael Cuddyer’s ongoing tribute to Lew Ford
Carl Pavano’s “brilliance”

Things you, a Twins fan, cannot be frustrated about today:

Sidney Ponson
Pitching in general
The return of the Josh Rabe era
½ price Tuesday and Dollar Dog Wednesday
The Dome

Dropping Bombs

I will start this post by saying I didn't actually see the game, just hi-lights. Or Yankee batting practice, whatever works for you. This year's "feel good story" for our beloved club got rocked last night by the Yankee All-star lineup. When I saw the score at a friendly neighborhood Applebee's last night, I really wasn't that shook up. Maybe I expected Sid to get rocked, but I think it's really a couple things that went through my head:

1. I don't expect my 5th starter to beat the Yankees. Yes, I want him to do better but truly what should we expect out of the 5 spot. 10 wins? 12 wins? 15 wins would be amazing. Let's not get too ahead of ourselves. It's more disturbing that a sinker ball pitcher gave up two homers and two doubles.
2. We got the back up plan sitting in Rochester waiting for his (their) chance at the big leagues. I'm fine with giving Sid 3 or 4 starts to see what he's got cause we got three guys in Rochester that could fill in. For the record it's Garza, Perkins and Slowey. Not Baker, don't see him as a starter for our squad.
3. I'm really more disappointed in the hitting and fielding. Specifically from our shortstop. I'm going to disagree slightly with Hops and say that in order for Mauer to get RBI's he needs two things: runners on base (see Punto and Bartlett batting averages), but does need to hit better with guys on. I'm not about to bash the batting champ (yet), especially when he's hitting about .350 for the young season. More disappointed with the Kubel error and Bartlett having 3 errors this year. I want to see that improve at a quicker pace cause I think (hope) the bats will come around. I do agree with Hops, Joe needs to be around the 100 RBI spot.
Namesake watch - How much do I love Torii? 2-3 last night, going to wear 42 in memory of Jackie and was on KFAN with Barreiro saying he's going to have a great year this year. I love this guy and definetely think he's worth the option.

Monday, April 09, 2007

The MFY’s Are In Your Town!


Yeah, me neither.

Is it too early in the season? Or could it be because of the starting pitcher?

Conflict: Do you root for Soul Glow to pitch well because he’s a part of your team now, and more strong pitching is a very good thing. OR do you root for a mediocre appearance…bad enough to jump start Garzapalooza? It’s obvious you root for more good pitching performances…but I’m having a tough time embracing Sir Sid. No really...I mean, I don't think I could physically get my arms around the guy.

Allright, allright...perhaps I'm being a bit too harsh on the more portly members of the staff. Silva did fine on Saturday...Boof's been boffo...who knows, maybe The Fat Man in a Little Coat will do just fine tonight. (If nothing else, I love the limitless nickname possibilities)


Can we make sure Amy Hockert stays inside her house for the next few days…I don’t want Jeter to take a run at her. He’s already taken enough of MN’s finest (see: Biel, Jessica).

Weekend recap…sans Jesus at the Masters.

The weather is ridiculous. Nice article from Reusse explaining how MLB has made it’s own bed.

Saturday’s game was painful…I hate games like that. Mostly ‘cuz I couldn’t take the idea of seeing a quote from Gardenhire the next day talking about how “…we ran into his best stuff out there today”. But, pleasantly, he mostly blamed the game on Cuddy.

Pencil in Johan for 26 wins this year…he’s just too damn good. If it comes out that in between starts he likes to unwind by playing Contra and NHL ’94…Smitty’s head will explode. Could Kaiser be right? That we’re (all of baseball, really) taking Johizzy for granted? I don’t think so. I do expect a win every time…but I’m still thrilled to watch it happen. So I say “nay” on taking for granted…at least not yet.

And finally, from Hop’s Corner of Negativity…Baby Jesus’s RBI total through five games: Rhymes with Hero.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Warm Fuzzy

It makes me feel all tingly inside when I read things like this, and makes it really hard to earnestly hate my mortal enemy's skipper:

“For me, they are the most underrated team in baseball. They find a way to beat you. That’s the type of team that will not beat itself. They will make you beat them. I have a lot of respect for them.'’

They have the best two players in the game right now and nobody knows about it. And that’s a shame. They got the catcher and the first baseman. They are tremendous players. Their right fielder is coming along to being a great player. The center fielder is the best in the game right now. They have a great second baseman.

This kid (Morneau) wins the MVP and nobody talks about him. We talk about the same people all the time. We talk about Manny (Ramirez), Big Papi (David Ortiz), Barry (Bonds). They never say anything about Mauer and company. That’s a shame people don’t give those kids the credit they deserve.

They play the game right. They get you in the right situations to beat you. The piranhas attack. That’s the way they attack. They go little by little and then you’re dead. They pitch, the make the play. They pitch and make a play. They move the guy over then boom, 2-0. Nathan is in the game, game is over.'’

Maybe it's time to get a new mortal enemy. I'm looking in your direction Tigers and Yankees...

(via Lavelle)

Thursday, April 05, 2007


Much like Greg Oden on Monday night, DKM shows exactly what all the fuss is about:

D Matsuzaka 7.0 6 1 1 1 10 1 108-74 1.29

TESSIE, bitches.

Ok, so it was the Royals (now with 100% more Gil Meche!), so perhaps a glorified spring training game. But, uhm, that's how you do it, Curt Schilling.

And also, PAPELBON!

You Can’t Spell 162 and O without O-rioles

In homage to Pulling a Blyleven, or in copyright infringement, at least, we present to you an IM transcript of a typical conversation in the life of TWT co-founders Hops and Kaiser (Smitty is a Luddite and doesn't understand computers and typing and logic circuits). This conversation was in no way edited after the fact to insert funny comments we wish we had made at the time or to make our unintelligible utterances, sentence structure, and overuse of the parenthetical readeriffic. Enjoy.

Hops : So...I think I should do a short post today entitled, "Who knew Ramon Ortiz meant 'Shut Up Aaron Gleeman' in Spanish?"
Kaiser: I like it. Did you hear Dick calling him "RAY mone" last night?
Hops : No...remember, I'm a radio guy. I was realizing last night that it's the time of the year when Dan Gladden and John Gordon are 2nd and 3rd behind my wife in "people I spend the most time around"
Kaiser: I'm sure she appreciates the company.
Hops : I assume Dick and Bert were predicting Cy Young?
Kaiser: I pretty much filter them out at this point. I have noticed they're making an awful lot of fart jokes lately though.
Hops: Has that replaced "Circle Me Bert"? Fart On Me Bert?
Kaiser: Dick made some comment about Bert riding home with someone and how they would need to "crack a window".
Hops: Sounds like every family get together I've ever been to...gotta love the "folksy"
Kaiser: Apparently they're trying to be "folksy" with the hispanic crowd now. By the way, that raises serious questions for me about your upbringing.
Hops: (really worried about where this is going)
Kaiser: (rapidly changing subjects) I forgot that Ortiz pitched against us in the ALCS against the Angels.
Kaiser: I remember thinking he was really good.

Hops: I was 0-3...pretty nasty stuff.
Hops: It's great, this time of year. Everything that happened this week has replaced everything that happened in spring training...and will be replaced again next week. And it's all "definitive".
Hops: Reminds me of Kyle Lohse
Kaiser: With his unmatched potential?
Kaiser: Constant potential.
Kaiser: Neverending potential.
Kaiser: Potentially.

Hops: I just really love how baseball can reinvent itself so many times over the course of a long season. Optimism of spring is either affirmed or ruined by one start. Which is absurd but wonderful. Absurdaful.
Kaiser: Wonder-urd?
Kaiser: Speaking of optimism of spring....
Kaiser: ...did you see any of the good-omen-filled opener?

Hops: Nada...could you see Joe Mauer getting taller?
Kaiser: Santana K'd the first batter, went 1,2,3 in the first....
Kaiser: ....Morneau and Namesake went back-to-back -- opposite field no less -- and the piranhas gnashed their way to like 57 stolen bases.
Kaiser: And Rondell had like the greatest catch I've ever seen.
Kaiser: And has walked twice already this year.

Hops: weren't the stolen bases in game two? And is Luis Castillo finally allowed to be a Piranha now that he's awesome?
Kaiser: I think Castillo was always a Piranha. Only Ozzie knows for sure.
Hops: Do you realize how giddy you are right now?
Kaiser: It's called "cautious optimism" buddy.
Hops: Why cautious? Throw caution into the artificially generated Metrodome wind. Particularly if Kent Hrbek is batting…it’ll go farther.
Kaiser: As members of the blogosphere, it's our duty to remain objective at all times and not get giddy about short-term trends.
Kaiser: So that we may evaluate them fairly and honestly.
Kaiser: And then make fart jokes.

Hops: Please never again call me a member of the blogosphere. We have, like, three readers.
Kaiser: Good point.
Hops: Why is there an off-day already?
Kaiser: Well, almost everyone else had one the day after the opener.
Hops: I'm just angry that I'm finally back and it's already get-a-way day. I say "let them play"
Kaiser: Not baseball's fault. I "feel really bad for you" that you are in this "predicament" because you were in Spain on vacation all last week.
Kaiser: No, "really". "I do."

Hops: This is kinda funny...we took the light rail home from the airport...and ended up at the Dome stop around 6:40 on Tuesday night...except that my body thought that it was 1:00am...which I still ignored and gave serious thought to asking my wife if she wouldn't mind taking the luggage home by herself so I could catch a bit of the game.
Hops: The really funny part? She was thinking the same thing.
Kaiser: That's what you call "marrying the right person".
Kaiser: (quotation marks not meant to denote sarcasm this time)

Hops: good save
Kaiser: Thanks.
Hops: We need to quantify and catalogue the phenomenon of lowered expectations with this team
Hops: I know Mauer won the batting title and is only getting bigger (pun)...but why isn't the Fightin' Canadian more prominent in the MLB marketing campaign this year? I see Ryan Howard everywhere.
Kaiser: Yeah, that's weird. Johan doesn't get much national time either.
Hops: No...vehemently disagree with that one. Everyone recognizes him as the best pitcher in baseball
Kaiser: I agree with that, but his awesomeness is just kind of a given. He’s so good he’s boring. Schilling gets WAY more discussion on a national level.
Hops: that's because he's annoying
Kaiser: Or Daisuke.
Kaiser: Who gives a crap if he can throw the gyroball?

Hops: hitters
Hops: and baby sheep
Kaiser: At best it moves like an inch.
Kaiser: I liked it better the first time when it was called a cut fastball.

Hops: Which you don't think is an important pitch? I think you're baiting me to make this more interesting. An inch is HUGE, understand. It's important to me that we all believe that an inch is HUGE. Okay?
Kaiser: Don't make me get out my yardstick.
Kaiser: It's not about the pitch. It's about the "phenomenom" of the pitch.
Kaiser: LIke's it's SO innovative.

Hops: The Gyroball (can we all agree to pronounce it "year-o"?
Kaiser: Only if it comes with extra tzatsiki.
Hops: What's more impressive is that fact that he can apparently throw six different pitches for strikes. And that his arm is apparently made of titanium. If he's successful, he could really change the way American coaches treat their pitching staff.
Hops: More innings, less babying
Hops: like old time hockey
Kaiser: That idea I like.
Kaiser: There is an obvious Japanese car maker joke here that we're missing. We could make that some kind of reader contest….if we had any.

Hops: He's pitching today, right? Afternoon game, I assume. I hope he throws all gyroballs and then flicks off the opposing batter every time he strikes them out
Kaiser: Think so. I hope he has a sharpie on him and everytime he strikes someone out with the gyroball he signs it and gives it to them.
Kaiser: Hey, I don’t know if you realized it, but apparently "Boof" sounds a lot like "BOOOOooOOoo!!!!!"?

Hops: They're not booing...they're boofing. Should I be sad that I really don’t miss Lew Ford at all?
Kaiser: Yes, I made that joke (along with 70% of the metrodome crowd) Tuesday when I was at the game.
Kaiser: And then in the 4th inning, after the Orioles got a home run, an absolutely blasted double, and a walk to Tejada to lead off the inning, I think people actually were booing.
Kaiser: Or boofing. If that’s slang for the sound vomit makes when it hits concrete.
Kaiser: I'll be here all week folks.

Hops: Stupid name. Solid pitcher. I have no worries about Boof.
Kaiser: He sounds like a surfer. Heard him interviewed?
Hops: probably...but why?
Kaiser: His name is SO appropriate. He is definitely a Boof. Perfect name.
Kaiser: Like if Johan was called "Sit Down Bitch".
Kaiser: Or Lecroy "Donut Please".

Hops: What would Mauer's be? "Vaginoplasty?"
Kaiser: Ouch.
Kaiser: You're way too hard on Mauer.

Hops: Yep. But he's the anti-Gilbert Arenas. Or, closer to home, The Namesake. He's so deep into his cocoon that it's hard to get interested in anything he does.
Hops: Someone's going to need to be vocal and lead the team when Torii's gone. I don't think it's going to be Baby Jesus. Most boring superstar around.
Kaiser: Alexi Casilla?
Hops: I think Morneau could be really great if he sticks around. I can totally see him turning into Hrbek. Cuddyer?
Kaiser: Cuddy, yes.
Kaiser: He's cute AND cuddly.
Kaiser: Like Teddy Ruxpin.

Hops: And drove in and scored 100 runs last year. Which was lost in all the (well-deserved) hubbub surrounding MVP, Cy-Young, batting champ.
Kaiser: Big time. Starting off nicely too. Good night last night before he knocked himself out of the game.
Hops: Yeah, heard that. I'd still rather see Morneau in the four-spot...but he's doing so well where he is, why move him right? I'm fine with that.
Kaiser: I LOVE the order right now. Except Bartlett and Punto might have to be swapped soon.
Hops: Punto's clearly the may have to bump him down a bit…like to Rochester.
Kaiser: He's one guy that Gleeman has been right about.
Kaiser: Too many strikeouts right now -- back to bad old habits.

Hops: And this comes back 'round to my point about how "definitive" things are week-to-week in baseball. It's been three games!
Kaiser: True. Good point.
Kaiser: He IS leading the team in hissy fits right now though...which is nice.
Kaiser: But to your previous (Mauer-related) point, at least it's emotion.

Hops: That's actually a category in my fantasy baseball league
Hops: I have A-Rod
Kaiser: Nice.
Kaiser: I heard he has an unbelievable HPS.

Hops: HPS?
Kaiser: Yep. Hissy Fits Plus Slugging? It’s in Moneyball…near the back.
Hops: 162-0
Kaiser: You can't go 162-0 without winning the first three.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Madre de Dios, Por Que No?

Hopefully, the 2-0 start to the season has alleviated, if only slightly, my co-hosts laments for last minute rotation decisions. There is absolutely no reason anyone can give me to dissuade me from believing that these Twins have a legitimate shot at a perfect season. As a matter of fact, the only thing I'm wondering about this morning is, in such a scenario, whether or not Joe Nathan or Johan Santana would win the Cy Young award.

(The best cure for Ponsonitis? A trip truly the only reason I haven't been sharing the above mentioned lamentations is that the local paper in Frigliana, Spain didn't have daily Twins' roster updates. But I'm back now, boys...refreshed and ready for the marathon.)